dang! you did miss the moment. inquire within what if.for know to not.

but seriously, what you say is true. it takes along time for me to train myself out of crap, if you know what i mean. I know this sounds hokey and all, but i have been taking a tantric yoga class, and i have really been benefiting big time from it. And thats its basic - come to balance the best you can, use your mind and body and conciousness to cultivate better mental habits, and practice being in the bliss body until you actually are in the bliss body. I love my chinese herbs, and already practiced asian kegels, hee hee, so i quickly began getting something out of my weekly sessions. And, the teacher is the first person to be able to push my endurance levels, with complete smiling joy, while pulling my body past myself. Turning anxiety into mind funtion. so it takes awhile, but one has to keep pushing for that personal and communal peace until it breaks thru and comes with ease.
i think.
anyway...........
if not, i have been very amused and inspired with the process.

Yeah, i hear you. I seem to become more 'close to the vest' as i age. I used to give in with abandon, and know i definetly test the water slowly first. Its been years since i had a fellow scorpio as a lover. At least it was easier to understand each other precisely. Good luck with the tiny steps, they lead to the garden in some instances! :) And you are a beautiful woman, so just know that whatever you think of yourself - others don't see the same way. And its never nearly as bad as we do ourselves! You rock Miss Phae, so they just need to get in line for your approval!
Best of wishes.